Thursday, 15 November 2012

+++ Incident Report +++

Tuesday 13th November
1500 hrs

Sir! Regret to inform that The Prisoner Newer Hamster has escaped. It appears that the side door of his prison cage was inadequately fastened and he has made a break for it, sir. Personnel on site sadly incapacitated at present and so unable to instigate full search. Will send in specialist search and rescue team when they finish training duties get home from school, sir.

Tuesday 13th November
1630 hours

Sir! Pleased to report that The Prisoner Newer Hamster has been located by specialist search and rescue team. Current position: curled up behind freezer in dining room. Current status: fast asleep. Plan of action: specialist search and rescue team have placed bait tempting food treats leading back to prison cage. Will keep you informed of progress, sir.

Tuesday 13th November
1700 hours

Sir! Delighted to inform that The Prisoner Newer Hamster is safely back in his prison cage. Trail of bait tempting food treats did the trick. Always helps to be informed of individual's weak points, sir. All personnel involved aware that The Newer Hamster's laziness is exceeded only by his greediness. Have instructed specialist search and rescue team to stand down and have ordered extra security measures to be implemented for the future. Recommend maximum security prison cage, sir.

+++ End of incident report +++

28 comments:

Ruth said...

You really have been house-bound too long, haven't you?!

Cheri said...

too funny Mel! Hope you got a photo or two and are able to turn this into a scrapbook page!

Alison said...

LOL!...Ruth's right methinks!!
Alison xx

Lizzie said...

Excellent! Made me chuckle for ages!
So glad The Hamster was safely tucked up in his own house by the end of the report!

Ginger said...

LOL! Great report Mel and I agree with Cheri - we need a photo of the Newer Hamster :)

Kirsty.a said...

Oh well done to the Search and Rescue team

Tammy said...

Thanks for the laugh! Glad the escapee was found! :)

Jane said...

glad the rescue/capture was a success!

scrappyjacky said...

At least the search and rescue team did not have to take up the floor boards as we did when the hamster escaped....and we were only looking after him for the weekend!!

Sarah said...

Oh, this is just such a brilliant report!! Love it! having moved various pieces of funiture in search for an escaped hamster myself I know the relief once they are safe back in their homes!! xx

Maria Ontiveros said...

Ah, the hamsters . . . they always prey on the weak and infirm. Lucky for you, you had able-bodied back up.
Rinda

Miriam said...

OOh you really need to get out Mel. Your post is soo funny and reminds me of the night I nearly died of shock when 'something' (turned out to be Annie the hamster) ran across my pillow in the middle of the night!!!

ComfyMom~Stacey said...

Obviously the Newer Hamster isn't too lazy if he got himself out of prison & behind a freezer. :)

jordiegirl said...

Brilliant post.

One of our hamster's used to escape from his cage too. Usually went behind the gas fire!!!!!!! Had to tempt him out with tasty treats too!

debs14 said...

What was his punishment for escaping? Solitary confinement?!

Mary B said...

lol
We lost a hampster up the chimney once and although we managed to recapture him he was black with soot and we thought that he would die, he was as clean as ever the next morning and full of beans by that night. Resilient little fellows

Scrappi Sandi said...

LOL!! I can so identify as our last hamster was a proper Houdini, but tempting treats did the trick every time!! Love how you presented this & it does indeed beg to be committed to a LO!! :D

Louise said...

ha ha!! you have made me smile this evening. At least your newer hampster didn't chew through your kettle wire and nearly blow you up!! xx

Jimjams said...

Oooh you have SPAM!

Our hamsters were suckers fro broccoli (and stereo wires). Very funny post Mel - thanks for the giggle!

furrypig said...

well written loved your post today hope you are doing ok xxx

alexa said...

Glorious! You've really made me smile! Reminds me of my husband's story about their escapee of a hamster who used to hide inside the leather sofa...

Melissa said...

So glad the prisoner, urr....newer hamster is back safely in his prison, urr ....cage! Great writing!!!

The Creative Beast said...

LOL!!!! I think the best part of this story was the observation:

"Hamsters laziness is exceeded only by his greediness"

FUNNY! Though, I must say, that sometimes food will tempt me too, if it is really good food =-)

Missus Wookie said...

one of our hamsters couldn't resist escaping.... but also couldn't resist a tunnel. So when curled up somewhere safe would suddenly see a tunnel appear and couldn't resist exploring this - usually got in and along a ways to find food and we'd move the entire tunnel/tube to attach it to home ;)

Looking forward to seeing the scrapbook page of the escapee and report ;)

Karen said...

LOL!!!!

Craftgirl83 said...

Hahaha, this actually had me giggling out loud. Brilliant!

Jo said...

Ha, ha, ha, this really made me laugh :)

Gail said...

LOL Thanks for the great laugh this morning and I think Ruth is right.